We have all heard blonde jokes, right? I cannot even begin to count the numerous jokes I have personally heard in my life time. And if I were not loyal to women kind, I would let my blonde sisters take the fall for being the only ones to be called "ditzy", however, I am a loyal person, and I will take the fall for my many, MANY "blonde moments".

For starters, for those of you who do not know me, I was born with a head full of black hair, which in years passed has faded to a very dark brown. I am not even close to having a light color of hair, no matter how hard you look... 'tis brown and will stay brown until age kicks in and it turns gray. I wouldn't be exaggerating if I said I've had at least 100 people have asked me if my hair was naturally supposed to be in a blonde state. Jokingly I would say yes sometimes because if I didn't then I would be accused to being on drugs, which contrary to popular belief is not true; I am all natural.

I often find myself talking, and forgetting what I was talking about in the middle of a sentence, or be telling someone a story (which, by the way, I'm a horrible story teller) and a couple hours, sometimes days, will pass and it will dawn on me that I didn't ever finish my story. Those are only misdemeanors compared to the stupidity felonies I have committed in my past.

I will now share with you some of my more memorable "blonde moments".

My sister, Randi, and I were watching a show that is no longer aired called " Kablam!", on Nickelodeon. Kablam was set up as a comic book that used a vast spectrum of animation techniques, with the hosts Henry and June; it was so hilarious, I don't know why they quit showing it. Anyway, at the end of the show, naturally, they would show the back cover of the comic book all the animated characters were housed in. That day the back of the back cover there was a picture of Henry and June and the word "Idiot" in big letters. I looked at the t.v screen and said to my sister, "I do it? What's that supposed to mean?"

"IDIOT!", Randi sharply replied.

"I'm not and idiot, don't call me that!" I quickly responded.

"No! It says 'idiot!'" she shot back in a very stern tone.

"Oh... my bad." I said, as I tucked my tail betwixt my legs.

Randi rolled her eyes and we both shared a laugh. Also to this day, although no one else gets it, if one of us is going to use the word 'idiot', we use the phrase 'I do it', instead. This is an inside joke Randi and I will share for infinity!

This next particular blonde moment happened when I was in middle school. It was almost time for Halloween, which meant the annual Anti-Van dance/games were going to be going on at Nevada Middle School. One night my stepdad, Rick, said to me, "So, do you have a date for Anti-Van yet?"

"October 31." I replied.

My mom and Rick both looked at me and started laughing. Poor little me was sitting there with a blank look on my face because I had no idea why they were laughing at me.

"What?" I asked out of my confusion.

"I meant do you have a DATE for the dance," Rick answered.

I could feel the blood rushing to my face. Oh my gosh! How could I have said that?! I'm such a loser, I thought to myself, as I once again tucked my tail in and said,

"Oooooh. No, I don't."

My last moment I'm not sure if it actually counts as a "blonde moment," but it goes along with my topic of discussion, so I shall share it.

My mom, Randi and I lived in Nevada for a year on Garfield Street. The Walton Pool wasn't to far away from our house, so everyday Randi and I would ride our bikes up to the pool for swimming lessons. This particular day, as I was putting on my swimming suit, I was talking on the phone with one of my friends. I got off the phone and we started heading up to the pool. We arrived in time for our lessons. We walked over to our little area in the 6 foot part of the pool. I took off my shirt and my shorts and was talking to a fellow classmate. Then that's when Randi ran over to me. She whispered in my ear, "You forgot to put your bottoms on!"

I looked down and saw my awesomely bad ensemble; a blue and had a tropical flower patterned bikini top, and a pair of white underwear with covered in little butterflies. OH MY GOSH! How could I have forgotten the bottoms to my swim suit?! I was very embarrassed to say the least. I froze up and didn't know what to do. Thankfully Randi was there; she told me to put my shorts back on and just swim in them. As I walked over to my pile of clothes, I was trying to be as calm as possible. I couldn't believe I had just done that! So I put my shorts on and went on with my swimming lessons, trying to act as normal as possible.

There are many more stories, I'm sure, but these are the ones that stick out in my head. There are things people do and say things just don't make sense, and then there are blonde moments. Sadly, I have them more often then not. I hope that the blondes of the world do not take offense to this story, for I was merely trying to get the word out so people might lay off the blondes, because there are brunettes and red heads out there that are just as, if not more, of an "I do it" than the stereotypical blonde. And with saying this, may there be peace amongst the hair colors. Learn from my mistakes: 1. Read the whole word, don't just glance, you may make yourself look foolish, 2. There are some words in the English language that are spelled the same but have totally different definitions, and 3. Don't talk on the phone while you're are getting ready to go somewhere because this is when distractions happen.

Peace.

P.S. - A special thanks goes out to my little sister for always being there to help me out when I have a "moment." THANK YOU RANDI! I HEART YOU TO THE MAX!