There's a snake in my pants!

This is the type of snake that we were dealing with. Isn't it cute??!!

I grew up on a farm in Richards, Mo., with my mom and little sister, Randi. We've always had an abundant amount of animals like horses, rabbits, cats, dogs, etc. However, one animal we were never allowed to have as a pet was a snake. Mom is terrified of snakes. Period. One of my first memories of mom vs. a snake happened when I was around 7, walking to the barn to play or something, when I almost stepped on a water moccasin, so I went and got my superheroine mom and she grabbed a shovel and slayed the snake. Something that my mother and I do not share is the fear of snakes.

One afternoon in the late springtime of my pre-teen years, my friend Annette and I were down at the pond playing. While walking around the pond, we started noticing the abundance of garter snakes that were around. It was like the Woodstock of garter snakes (I think they may have been mating, because there was this HUGE group of them all in one spot). For those of you who don't know, garter snakes are a very common, non-venomous snakes, that are black with small yellow stripes going down their backs. They are harmless, but the smell horrible (obviously not horrible enough because they still intrigued us). Anyway, we started catching them. But there were so many, and we wanted to keep them for a little bit and play with them. A light bulb came on in my head, when I remembered a glass fish tank that had been by the barn. I ran over and grabbed it and we started putting the snakes in it.

After we were done harvesting the snakes, we did a big no-no. We took the snakes up to the carport. As you already know, my mom is scared of snakes, and us bringing the snakes up to the house, where my mom was, probably wasn't the best idea ever. We sat the fish tank down, and started playing with our catches. By that time we only had about three or four snakes. And we were thankful for that when we heard the door inside the house open. Mom came out the screen door to tell us something. Oh no! WHAT DO WE DO? I don't remember what Annette did with her snakes, but I had the bright idea of putting my snakes underneath my legs. That may be the reason why I didn't pay attention to what she did with her serpents.

As mom stood there talking to us, I could feel one of the snakes slithering closer and closer to my shorts. It kind of tickled the underside of my leg, but I tried super hard not to move, as I knew I would be in deep doo-doo. Then I felt the head of the snake go up into my shorts. I tried clinching my legs together tighter but it was no use. I could feel it still moving up more into my shorts. The whole time trying not to make any weird faces, or noises. Honestly, WHO wants a snake in their pants? Not I!

I swear Mom talked for like 10-15 minutes; even though it probably wasn't that long, it felt like it. I think Annette knew something was wrong. She knew I had put the snake under my legs, and she could see my slight movements of uneasiness. Finally Mom quit talking, and went back inside. I stood up right as the second door shut and pull the snake out of my shorts. Ohhhhh what a relief! After that, we released the snakes and Mom never knew a thing.

Moral of this story: What Momma don't know, won't hurt her. And with saying that, Mom, I'm sorry I brought the snakes up by the house; also, sorry you had to find out about the error of my way through my blog. But my "mum's the word" attitude kept me from a world of pain.

Peace.