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Nevada, Missouri ~ Friday, August 8, 2008
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Bad Attitude
Posted Monday, May 12, 2008, at 3:47 PM<< Previous | Read comments | Respond | Email link | Next >>
I have a bad attitude.
At least, that is what my husband says.
He's right.
Ok now, guys, before you start cheering, and ladies, before you get up in arms, hear me out.
I have been noticing lately that I am concentrating an awful lot on the negative aspects of life. I'm tired. The house is always a mess. Josh doesn't help me as much as I need him to. Cainan screams at the top of his lungs. I don't have enough time for myself.
All of these things are true. Some are circumstances I have control over, or at least some control anyway. Some are not. Either way, grumbling about them is making me, and everyone around me miserable. Fighting with my husband to clean the house only leads to more fighting. Some of these situations are not fair, and I have a hard time not voicing my opinion in that fact. Does that mean that I should have to do all of it? Of course not. But a book I read, "Lies Women Believe and the Truth that Sets Them Free," by Nancy Leigh DeMoss, had a chapter that encouraged women to let go of some of those everyday battles and pray for God to change their husbands' hearts. As I have tried to practice this advice, I find life a lot less stressful.
Contemplating all this one Sunday while in church, God led me to turn in my Bible to Philippians 2:14, "Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life--in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing." (NIV)
Do everything without complaining and arguing. Yeah right, I thought. No disrespect to God. I knew it was what I was supposed to do. The hard part, I thought, was doing it. This is where I falter in my faith. I know if I let God work through me, I will be able to work through my daily activities without complaining. I am hindering the process.
It's easy, as I sit in church, to nod my head in agreement with the pastor as he preaches about living according to God's Word, building people up, honoring each other at home and living life with the heart of a servant. But then church service ends and I have to go home with my husband and son, and myself.
One of the things that I pray most often for myself is for God to give me the heart of a servant. To understand that as I work through the day, fix dinner, do laundry and wash dishes, I do so patiently and in a manner that worships God and honors my family. No sooner does the prayer leave my lips than something happens and the frustration rises up in me. It is a daily battle.
The truth is that while I don't have control over many things that happen, I do have control over my attitude, my anger, and my patience. I can only do so through the strength of the Lord. Ephesians 4:1-2 says, "As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."
My husband and I were watching television yesterday and a non-profit commercial came on profiling orphans in Africa. We watched, with teary eyes, as a little boy took care of his even smaller brother. They lived in a cave. They slept on plastic. They were lucky if they ate.
We are so spoiled.
I praise God for those reminders in my life. I have a messy house to clean, but it's a house for my family and I to live in. I have a husband I argue with, but he's a decent man who is trying his hardest and has made some amazingly fast and tough transitions in his life to be by my side. I have a toddler in his "terrible two's", but he's healthy and amazing and he loves me unconditionally. When I remember that friends who have lost spouses and/or children, I am so thankful to God that my husband and child are safe and well. I have dishes to wash, but that means we had enough good food to eat on them.
When I think of it all this way, I am so ashamed of every complaining or arguing. God has blessed me so very abundantly with wonderful people and things in my life. To complain about these blessings in my life is nothing less than disrespectful to God. There's an old saying, "You don't know what you got 'till it's gone." Not anymore. It's time to start praising God for the blessings He has placed right in front of us. Comments Showing comments in chronological order [Show most recent comments first] |
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You are so insightful! And this is why I heart you!
You are not alone. I would like to be more respectful about the things and the life that God has given me, but just when I think I'm doing alright, there I go again. Take today for example. I got home from work and asked my husband, "Did you get those phone calls made today?" He responds with, "What phone calls?" It was right then that my day that had been very good went completely down the drain. Before I even thought about it, I began to lecture him about being neglectful about getting the appointment made at the mechanic, and neglectful about ordering the propane since we are at 14%. By the time I got done, it was time for him to leave for work for the night. There was not the normal "good-bye, have a good night" with me waving to him from the deck as he leaves. No "I love you." I read your blog and realized I am not the only person this happens to. The two things I really hate about this are: being disrespectful to God; and the feeling and opinion I have about myself after being so aweful. I should be thanking God for giving me an extra vehicle to drive while mine is broken; I should be thanking God for the propane that is in the tank and trusting that God will see to it that we get it taken care of before letting it run out. I have spent the evening kicking myself for acting disrespectful and I have been thinking about all those that lost loved ones and their homes this weekend. Then I thought, "If I cannot have enough faith in God when those petty phone calls are not made, how can I have faith in God if my home is ever totally destroyed or I lose a loved one." Thank you for getting me thinking. I count on your messages. Please keep posting them.
I am sorry that you and your husband had an argument. That is a familiar scene to me. I am glad that this blog got you to thinking. I give all the glory and praise to God! I believe that He gave me this wonderful talent to write through me. I hope I am using it for what He intended. It's very nice and encouraging to know that there are readers who benefit from these messages.
I was touched by your point that if we can't have faith in God for the little things, how will we have faith in God for the bigger things. I struggle with this also. It is hard to let go and let God, but it essential that we do so. The more I do, the better I feel.
God Bless!
Forgiveness is key. Forgive yourself for not being perfect, especially. Forgive others. Forgive the clock for ticking too fast. Forgive the ninny who cut you off in traffic. It really lightens the load.:)