Through a glass darkly

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

I never knew his name until I learned of his death. Everyone just called him Papa, and everyone knew him. I never became really close to Papa, despite the fact that I really liked him. I learned more about Papa in the four days after his death than in the more than 10 years I'd known him.

I'm not sure when I first met Papa, I would go into Quick Dine and one day there he was, working. The first thing I noticed about Papa was his smile. Papa was constantly smiling, no matter what else he was doing. He may have been sweating in the heat of the kitchen as he worked away at his task but you could bet there would be a smile on his face. You could tell it was the bright, engaged smile of an intelligent person who knew why he was happy.

No matter when or where I saw him he greeted me warmly, and he treated everyone the same way. Mostly I saw him in Quick Dine but I'd occasionally see him in other places, the grocery store or Wal-Mart, he would always smile and say hello.

Once I got to know him it was like I had always known him, his presence was noticed only by its lack. When I went in to Quick Dine, his was the face I expected to see. Oh, sure there are people I greet when I go there, but Papa is the person who could make the visit better, just by being there.

Papa inspired respect. I never knew how old Papa was, and I never asked. I felt it was something just not done, not that I figured he would feel vain about his age and not want to answer, but because I felt it would be an impertinence.

I didn't know about his past and didn't ask for the same reason I never inquired about his age. It was my loss. I would have enjoyed and cherished any memories he would have shared with me but I never felt justified in asking.

Tai Tong Yuan, known far and wide as Papa, was 83 years old. He was born in Zhejiang Shaoxing, China, in 1921, the son of Tsai and Kim Yuan. He graduated from the Teachers Academy in 1936 and joined the Chinese Air Force Weather Service where he served during World War II. He and his family left China and moved to Taiwan in 1949 and from there moved to the United States in 1981.

Papa became an American citizen in 1999 and showed his pride in that achievement to everyone he met. He was a good citizen, a person who made his community better by his presence. He enriched the lives of the people he touched as he enriched the community he lived in. He will be missed.