Hi neighbors. It's officially summer and it certainly feels like it! Have you fried your morning eggs on the sidewalk yet? It probably would work! Although the actual "dog days" don't start till later, dogs are having a tough time of it even now. And people aren't faring any better.

Heat.

A few months ago I was hoping summer and heat would hurry up and get here. Well, here it is and I'm not the least bit happy with it.

Time to whip out the old slip n' slide for the toddlers and get the older kids to the pool. Just remember that being in the water doesn‚t keep them from getting sunburns, so pour on the sun block liberally.

We have all heard the songs about "lazy days of summer," "Summertime and the living is easy," and "V A C A T I O N -- in the summer sun!" From all the song lyrics a person would think summer time is the perfect weather for being outdoors. I don't think so.

"Perfect" outdoor weather is cloudy, a breeze of at least 10 miles per hour, less than 5 percent humidity and a high of 75 degrees Fahrenheit.

To balance this there should be a low at night of 55 or less. Oh, and let's suggest no bugs either.

Now that we have the scenario for perfect weather, what should we be doing outside in it? Baseball? Swimming? Tennis? Golf? Horseback riding? Although many people enjoy these activities, none of them are my cup of tea. Actually even a cup of tea isn't my "cup of tea." Iced tea maybe, or hot coffee.

I had thought the farther north one traveled the colder the weather would be. I found out last week that wasn't so. Nevada was in the 80s and 90s while Iowa was melting with a heat indes of more than 100 degrees.

What is really amazing is that the people who pay for the chance to get out into the weather to do these things would refuse to do them in the heat for money.

Unless you have your own private golf course or tennis court, you have to pay to play. Same with baseball, you have to join a team, buy a uniform, and get all your own gear. Swimming isn't without cost. Sure, the daily or even seasonal ticket may not cost that much. But the tanning bed rentals, the new outfit to wear over the swimsuit, the new swim suit, and the new hair coloring to match the new skin tone you got at the tanning beds-- runs into a great deal of cash. And some times these people never actually get into the water, other than to wet down periodically.

Horseback riding -- have you tried to buy a horse lately? Unless you are into bareback, you will also need a saddle, bridle, leading ropes, halter, and a horse trailer to get to where you are going to ride. Ride the horse to the riding trail? No can do!

Then of course there are all the needs for the horse itself. Food and water are no small concern for such a large animal. Shots and certifications of health are necessary on some trails and most camping facilities where horses are taken for their weekend walks.

If you are a horse person and want to travel the riding trails of the U.S. parks systems; you will need to take your own camping gear.

Camping! Now there is an outdoor activity everyone has done to some extent over his or her lifetimes. Sleeping out under the stars (or under a tent in the almost mandated thunderstorm) making your own fire, finding your own grub, fishing for substance.

Or, you could be a modern camper (at least in my ideal weather scenario) and take the RV.

At least you will have bathroom facilities that don‚t include poison ivy and screens to keep out mosquitoes, flies, bees and skunks at night.

The great outdoors! So much to do and see and explore. Yes, the great outdoors is great.

Particularly when seen from the inside of an air-conditioned house. I don‚t mind a walk in the perfect weather I have described. However, outdoor walks any other time seem harmful to my health.

Until the next time friends remember; baseball games are on television. There are books and videos about parks, fishing, camping, golfing and horseback riding. There are books about almost any plant or animal I might encounter in the wilderness.

And they are all available from my recliner, with the air conditioner on and the coffee pot heating.