Sock it to me

Friday, November 23, 2007

I wonder who designs socks. I'm not talking about the cute puppies or flowers some socks have on them. And I'm not referring to the style. Some socks just barely show under the pair of shoes. Others go up to the knees. I prefer the ones that go up high enough on my legs that there won't be a glaring bare spot of legs showing between my slacks and the tops of the socks. It is more the style that most men wear, probably for the same reason.

But none of those things concern me.

I want to know what numbed-toe person thought it would be a good idea to have the seam of the socks right above the middle part of your toes. The seam hits the skin of your toes just where the shoe begins to taper toward the end. This gives a double uncomfortable effect.

The toes are crowded into the shoe more at that point. And the sock, which should be there to protect your skin from movement between your foot and the stiffness of the shoe, adds a thick seam to the mix.

I met a woman who said she tried to alleviate this problem by wearing the sock wrong side out. That does reduce the discomfort somewhat but there is still the extra bulk even though the roughness of the seam is diminished.

But isn't that crazy? Why should we have to turn a sock inside out to be more comfortable when it then is showing the less desirable side to the world? I like to wear the fun-type socks at times. We can have designs that show the season, the holiday, or some favorite animal or flower. If I turn those inside out then there is nothing but a mixture of colored threads. The design is not clear at all.

I guess tube socks don't have a seam at the toes. But they are too bulky and unattractive to wear for social or business wear.

If they can make tube socks without a seam, why can't they make shorter, more form fitting socks without seams? If I wasn't middle age plus maybe I could form a company to make such socks. I could advertise it as "Carolyn's Comfortable Seamless Socks". I would have women and men pulling their socks up away from the tops of their toes and saying, "At last I can buy a pair of socks that feel good." I might even get rich. But one of the benefits of being middle age plus is that you can have great ideas and nobody really expects you to do anything about them. I can keep on complaining, and say, "If I were just a few years younger." while you know full well you wouldn't have really done it at any age. It's easier to say, "Why don't THEY.?" than to do anything about it.

But that's an advantage of being a columnist. My job is to talk about things. I don't have to really DO anything. I tell my readers what's bugging me and maybe somebody will use an idea to get rich. That would be nice.

If it does happen, I hope whoever it is will at least be nice enough to send me a package of the socks they manufactured. I would be happy to write about them in exchange.

In the meantime if you see me with socks on wrong side out, don't think that I have finally lost it and don't know how to dress myself. Just realize I don't want a seam stepping on my toes.