The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.
|1.||Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.|
|2.||Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.|
|3.||Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.|
|4.||Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.|
The also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or chainging one letter, and s upply a new definition.
|1.||Bozone (n.), the substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sig of breaking down in the near future.|
|2.||Dopeler effect (n.), the tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.|
|3.||Caterpallor (n.), the color you turn after finding half a grup in the fruit you're eating.|