[SeMissourian.com] A Few Clouds ~ 92°F  
Heat Advisory
Friday, Aug. 22, 2014

Talking the talk

Saturday, July 5, 2008

The following was sent to me by a friend: An old gentleman decides to go on a hunting safari in Africa, taking his faithful, elderly Jack Russell dog, named Killer, along for the company.

One day the old Jack Russell starts chasing rabbits and, before long, discovers that he is lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old Jack Russell thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!" Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the old Jack Russell exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?" Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him, and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!" says the leopard, "That was close! That old Jack Russell nearly had me!" Meanwhile, a monkey, who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes, but the old Jack Russell sees him heading after the leopard with great speed and figures that something must be up.

The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans, and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!" Now the old Jack Russell sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?"

Instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet. Just when they get close enough to hear, the old Jack Russell says, "Where's that monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!" Moral of this story. . . Don't mess with the old dogs. . . age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery!

Dick Hedges
Fort Scott Community College