The third cup 6/8

Sunday, June 8, 2003

Hi neighbors. When we pass the age of 50, people start yammering at us all the time to stay active. To them I say "active" can be defined in many ways. To some people, being active means climbing a mountain, bunjie jumping, and ski trips to Denver. Other people think being active is walking in the heat through a zoo all day, sitting in a boat fishing, or being involved in any game involving sticks and balls. Some of us define "active" as raising and lowering the lever on our recliners and getting up and letting the dog in and out of the house three times every hour. Sometimes we folks over 50 remember we used to get up at 6:30 a.m., five days a week, and put in an "active" 15 hour day before getting any sleep. Remembering that makes us think maybe we should get an electronic recliner. We over 50 and retired people don't want to think about being active all the time. Sometimes we just want to sip our coffee and muse about things in the past. If the coffee is particularly strong, we might even venture a thought of comparison to past things and current things. If we have grandchildren, and time for more than three cups of coffee, we might even blend all those thoughts into notions about the future. Many times a quiet, thoughtful walk can help the body and the mind stay active. After a long walk, the stimulation of trying to remember how to get back home, can stimulate other memories. It seems odd to me how some memories can hide from us like dust bunnies under a bed. We don't remember them being there till we go looking for them. The other day I was sorting out some papers in a file drawer and came across a stack of handwritten musical scores and lyrics. I set them aside. No need to look at them because it seemed I had always known what they were. As long as could remember, I had periodically seen these pages -- often when Mom was doing what I was doing now, sorting long filed papers. I don't recall ever being told to leave them alone, but some things children just instinctively know are personal treasures of their parents and shouldn't be bothered. To the best of my memory, I had never seen Mom actually take them out and look at them. I had never thought she needed to; she had always simply put them back in a box and set it aside without comment. I got the impression she had each page memorized. Laying them out on the table I read through them one by one. It dawned on me that these sheets of brittle notebook paper must be close to 70 years old. How could simple song lyrics be so important to anyone that they would treat the stack of them like treasures for so many years? Although she hadn't often told the story, I knew it well. Mom and her sister had once been professional singers on a radio station in Ohio. Mom played the guitar to accompany them. Their career didn't last long as they were only teenagers and their mother wouldn't let them go alone to perform in other cities. As I tried to remember the exact words and facial expressions she had used when telling the story; I recalled no trace of regret in her voice; no twinge of lost opportunity on her face. The guitar cords had been written in pencil over the lyrics, then retraced in ink. I wondered if she had only made them permanent once she had memorized the fingering. The song lyrics were written one song to a side of the paper. At the end of each song was the name of the performer, or sometimes the person who had copied the words off for her. I spent the day carefully putting each page in a protective sleeve in an album. No more would these treasures be moved from box to box and carefully stacked as the need for space mandated. That day I stayed very active, moving boxes, moving memories, digging up long-buried treasure. As I put the last piece of paper in its protector I wondered again what these simple songs had symbolized to my mother. I may never understand all of her reasons for cherishing them all those years. Maybe she didn't have a reason beyond needing the exercise of moving the boxes. Until the next time friends remember; keeping your body in shape is good advice, but taking time to remember why is even more important.

To Read More
Subscribe Sign In
Continue reading with a subscription
Subscription options