Opinion

Middle age minus

Thursday, January 3, 2008

I have titled my columns Middle Age Plus to refer not only to the advance of years past middle age, but also to point out the pluses of this age.

There are many pluses. But today I am speaking of minuses.

Even if you live a healthy, happy life into the upper decades there is one thing that keeps these later years from being completely on the plus side.

Many of our dear friends and loved ones have died.

On Christmas Day we lost two people who were very special in our lives. I doubt if they knew each other. Since they were both prominent in the United Methodist Church and at one time were in the same district of the denomination, it is possible that they did meet. One was a minister and the other was the type of lay person that every minister dreams of having in the congregation.

The Rev. Allen Findley died at his retirement home in Lamar, with his wife, Dorothy, and other family members present, after a long illness. He had served 18 churches in western Missouri. Steve McDowell died suddenly at his home in Independence, Mo., as he and his wife, Elsie, were preparing for their family to come for Christmas. He had been a long-time member and faithful worker in the Mt. Washington United Methodist Church.

Allen and Lester were roommates during their three years in seminary at St. Paul School of Theology in Kansas City, and sometimes carpooled from the churches they were serving in southwestern Missouri, for the four days each week they spent away from their families and their churches. They were ordained at the same time and later served three of the same churches at different times. The two families visited together occasionally in the busy schedules of four children, churches and extended family activities. Lester and Allen always remained close. When both men retired within 30 miles of each other the chances for visits increased. Allen was an avid reader and loved my books so I delighted to be able to share with him.

Steve and Elsie became our friends when Lester was appointed to the Mt. Washington United Methodist Church. It was our first time to be in a metropolitan church and to not have any of our children at home with us. We appreciated the warmth and friendliness of this special congregation. Often after a Church board meeting in the evening that didn't take too long, Steve would suggest that we come to his house to play cards or visit.

Steve and I served on some Conference Committees together and would often be in a carpool where we discussed the affairs of the church and the world.

His commitment to the larger church as well as his own congregation was an inspiration. He cared about the individuals at Mt. Washington. He also cared about lives of those far away.

Both men were proud of their denomination and loyal to it, but both men also had very strong faiths and lived their commitments daily.

The fact that they left this world at Christmas time was sad, yet it reminded us of the gift we have in knowing these special friends. Their lives were a big plus to ours, but their passing has left a minus in our lives also.

We are left with hundreds of warm and funny memories of two men who were sincere in their faith but enjoyed life to the fullest. Those memories will continue to add pluses to the lives of those who knew Steve and Allen.